Happy New Year! I hope you all enjoyed the break as much as I did! We stayed at home for Christmas and then went to our place in the country. It was perrrrfect. (My dad says our generation uses the word “perfect” too much, which made me laugh. Just wait, you’ll hear it all the time now- ha!)
I’m so excited about 2019, I can hardly stand it! The first thing that comes to mind when I think about 2019 is the word fearless. Oh yikes, that sounds so cheesy. Isn’t that the name of a country song? Maybe I should change it to less fear in 2019? That sounds way more attainable anyway -ha! I’m going to feel the fear and do it anyway! It reminds me of this hilarious quote by Iyanla Vanzant. She says, “If you don’t have little bit of pee rolling down your leg, then you’re not living big enough.” (You guys have to watch the full clip (here). It’s hilarious! She’s not being literal… It’s obviously metaphorical!)
When I started blogging almost 6 years ago, I posted whatever came to me. It was exciting and exhilarating, and I was clueless about what would be successful, get the most likes or get a mean comment. I was just doing my thing. Well, I’m going back to that fearless state of mind (although, at the time, I was just oblivious -ha!)!
Don’t get me wrong, this is not just the flip of a switch for me. It’s been a long time coming. I’ve been working on this for years, and it’s still a work in progress. First, there were the years of learning and realizing that I was ruled by what people thought of me (True story: My whole day was ruined once because I thought the CVS checker didn’t like me.). Then there were the years of working hard and understanding that I had a people pleasing problem. There was lots of talking to my counselor, husband and friends and lots of reading. In fact, I remember this time last year, I said that my hope for myself was that I would get to a point in my life where I would not care what people thought of me.
During these years, I would talk to my husband about the CVS checker, the lack of “likes” on a picture, how many followers I had, a nasty comment, how much another blogger was doing vs. how little I was doing, etc. My husband kept telling me, “Your identity is in Him, not in any of this.” I thought, “What in the world is he talking about?!?” Now I get it. I was on a journey of finding myself in God and understanding God’s unconditional love for me.
I didn’t have to hustle for His likes, or prove myself to Him because he made me just the way I am. He created me, so obviously he likes His creation!!! I had to let that sink in for a long time, and every time I started my hustling, I’d check myself. I had to learn that I didn’t need to search for my worth and identity in my clothes, kids, house, things, looks, life, feelings and, most of all, what other people thought of me.
Now that I know my identity is in HIS love for me, I can live with less fear, and I can’t wait! This may mean I do posts on a more sporadic schedule, and it may mean that I share fun stuff that’s inspiring me, like an easy weeknight recipe, or my new bunkbed room in our country place. Isn’t this exciting?! It excites me! Since it will be a bit more sporadic, be sure to subscribe here on the blog and follow along on Instagram.
And now for my disclaimer: While I was writing this post, I randomly started looking at someone’s blog who writes a post every day, and then it started… “How does she do that?” “Why can’t I do that?” “Why am I not more motivated?” I’m certainly not immune from the comparison game or living scared, but now I can see it and that’s half the battle, right? As Bob Goff says, “Tend to your own fire.” I’m going to keep my head down and do my thing. I don’t know where that leads, but I can’t wait to get started!
Happy 2019!!! It’s going to be an exciting year! Thanks for following along!
Bring it! Yes, Carly! (insert kissy face emoji)
Yassss! I love your enthusiasm, friend! You make me even more excited!
I will be follow whatever posts you post, whenever you post them:-) I’m sure your family will feel a difference as well – an awesome example for your boys!
I like this thought, Heather! I think so, too!
The world needs more of this!
Thanks, friend! XOXO
This post reminds me of the children’s book “You are Special” by Max Lucado! Such a good reminder of how no one else’s “stars or dots” matter….. only what He thinks does.:) If you haven’t read it before, I think you’d love it! I still read it to myself at times as well as to our four children.:)
I’m ordering it right now! Thanks for the recommendation!
Carly-whoa. I love this post. I so needed to read this at this time in my life. Honestly I don’t have time to read all of your posts but this title sounded like something I needed. So many changes and stresses going on with me right now—I need to embrace the “less fear” thing. I need to listen to God—he is there for me/my family. Thank you for this post. And happy new year!
Kim, Thank you for your sweet comment. This life is tough. I won’t tell you any different. The best advice a friend gave to me during a particularly difficult time was, “cling to Him.” Happy New Year my friend!
Beautiful! Love your post! 😘
Thank you for your comment!
So glad you believe in HIM and aren’t afraid to say so. God is good.
May God richly bless you in 2019.
Thank you, Linda!
Love this post, Carly!! ❤️
Thanks, Elizabeth!
A most wonderful mentor always tells me, Live to Please an Audience of One! I tell my children that as well. We are all worthy in His sight. Thanks for sharing this.
Love this post and you, friend!!!! So proud of how far you have come. I’m so glad I’ve had a front row seat. You inspire me and should be so proud of your self. You have worked so hard.
Love this! In my business I do the same thing… the comparison game. So hard not to but your final quote from Bob Goff is exactly what I needed to hear! Thank you for your transparency and reminder that our worth is in Him, not in any of this other stuff!
I really like the way your blogs are transforming. I heard something the other day that when you compare yourself to others (oh, I can’t do this because she’s funnier, prettier, smarter, etc.) then you are only short-changing yourself. Find what YOUR super-power is and USE IT!! Be you and do what you need.
Hugs!
Amen and AMEN! This is exactly what life is about ~ or should be. I saw a quote once that said, “More of HIM, less of others.” I took that to mean I should stop caring about what others thought of me and focus solely on God’s opinion. This is a great reminder of that and that aAs long as I’m pleasing God and hopefully furthering his Kingdom, I’m in the right lane! Ironically though, you know what I thought as I read this precious post? “I like her!” : ) Not that it should matter! haha
💜💜💜💜missed you and love your raw honesty!
I have never understood the “post everyday” thing. I follow a lot of bloggers and have no idea who posts when. I am happy to receive a blog post from you whenever that may be and pay no attention to when the last post was. It’s obvious when a blogger is just trying to put content out there for sake of having something to post.
Posting when you feel inspired is way more interesting to the reader. Keep doing your thing, Carly.
You are very authentic, beautiful, and kind. 🙂
Also, I keep waiting for pictures of your house. The snippets I see have me so inspired to try something more bold in my own home!
Bring it! Yes, Carly! (insert kissy face emoji)
I love this! I’m late to the game but this definitely resonates as I described wanting to live without feeling fearful to my husband just last night – wanting to just kind of live more and not be so in our heads. I appreciate all that you do and your perspective 🙂